When I got home from work the other day, Sullivan and Bridgette met me in the driveway with a harrowing story about their new pet. They found a grasshopper floating sideways in the pool. They thought it was dead and fetched their dad to fish it out. Robert poked at it a few times to make sure it wasn’t alive. Just as he was about to toss it in the trash he noticed that it began to twitch, like its body was inhaling.
Today, my kids think their dad is a superhero. They think he brought a grasshopper back to life! Robert wants everyone to know that is, in fact, the case, and he did it while running in slow motion with his shirt off.
Sullivan named the insect Hopsters.
Hopsters proceeded to knock the absolute crap out of his head jumping up and down in one of my brand new canning jars. Finally, after being held captive in the jar for a few hours, he lay lifeless on his sweet, little bed of grass. Fearing we might have to have a funeral for him, I tried to convince the kids to set him free. Instead, they shook the jar up and down and up and down, until the little booger started to move.
Basically, we saved a grasshopper’s life twice today.
On the flip side, we recently fed a grasshopper to our praying mantis. Well, we put the two of them together. I suppose it could have gone the other way. This isn’t a picture of the carnage; it’s just the mantis: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=340486799363864&set=a.213448562067689.53886.211529215592957&type=1
BOYCOTT AMERICAN WOMEN
Why American men should boycott American women
Boycott American Women
I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?
American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.
This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.
Tens of millions of American men have had their lives completely destroyed by American women through the following crimes:
1. False rape accusations (it has been proven that up to 80 percent of rape accusations are FALSE)
2. False domestic violence (DV) charges (same as above)
3. Financial destruction of men in divorce courts through alimony and support payments (women get up to 95 percent of their ex-husband’s income and savings, as well as the house, car, etc)
4. Emotional destruction of men by ex-wives who have stolen their children from them and forbidden contact
5. Divorced dads who commit suicide as a result
Not one single American woman has EVER condemned their fellow American women for committing these crimes against men. Silence means consent. Therefore, American women support and enjoy destroying men’s lives and causing men to commit suicide. Apparently, American women think it is okay to be a criminal, just as long as you are a woman. Therefore, is it any surprise that a huge percent of American men no longer want anything to do with American women, other than using them for easy sex and then throwing them away?
Over 50 percent of American women are single, without a boyfriend or husband; so the fact is most American men no longer want to marry American women. Let these worthless American women grow old living alone with their 10 cats.
BOYCOTT AMERICAN WOMEN!
This is unprecedented. I’m commenting on my own photo. But, Hopstesr looks like he has teeth!!